To Hold On

Writers: Eimi, Dana
Date Posted: 30th May 2006

Characters: Almonteo, Traelyn
Description: Traelyn confides a little in Almonteo
Location: Dolphin Cove Weyr
Date: month 11, day 24 of Turn 3

Almonteo

"Well, well... If it isn't the distinguished Hallmaster himself!" Traelyn called with a smile over the drone of the waves, shading her eyes against the bright sunlight as he suddenly turned on his heel in the sand, approaching her. "And without his boots, no less! It's not often one sees that!" Her voice lightly teased him as she shifted, once again leaning back against her sleeping dragon's golden side. "I don't blame you, you know. It's a beautiful afternoon to be out."

"Ah! Trae, and Nyith. My duty to you both." He looked up at the bright blue sky and grinned. "That it is. I was going to ask my wife to take a bit of a stroll with me out here, but she was napping. I didn't feel like waking her. Mind if I join you?"

"Of course not. Here, have a seat beside me. Nyith won't mind, will you, my love?"

The queen looked up sleepily, having come out of her doze to greet the Harper Hallmaster. She blinked once, her whirling, rainbow-hued eyes glittering in the sun. }:I do not mind.:{ With a rustle of her great wings, she shifted, moving her tail out of the way, making room for him to sit beside her rider.

"Thank you very much Nyith," the Hallmaster smiled and directed a polite bow towards the great swirling eye. He sank down in the sand next to the Weyrwoman and carefully leaned back against the golden hide. "I'm not hurting her, am I?"

}:I like him very much,:{ Nyith commented, pleased by his courtesy.

Grinning, Traelyn shook her head. "Not at all. And don't hesitate to put all your weight against her, Almonteo... She's sturdy." She ran a hand against the smooth hide before giving it a loving pat. "So Carmora is napping, is she? Shards, she's a smart woman. I might have to follow her example later on today!"

"Me too," he chuckled. In fact, he would have liked to have curled up right next to his wife, but the sunshine was too inviting not to take advantage of it. "So... how are things? Have you finally settled into your Weyr, Weyrwoman?"

"I think so." She gave him another smile before turning her eyes out to the sea. On some days, she felt much more settled than others. "And what about you? I know making the transition to the Weyr hasn't been easy, Almonteo."

"I think we're managing all right so far," the Hallmaster said with a satisfied nod. "There were a few tense moments in there, but I think things are going quite well. How is your bronzerider friend?"

"U'kaiah? He's doing well." Loosening the ties on her gauzy blouse, she moved into a more relaxed position, stretching her legs out onto the warm sand. "He took me out last restday..."

"Well..." the Hallmaster said quickly averting his eyes from the cleavage she so easily exposed. "That must have been an exciting day."

She glanced at him, a blonde brow quirked. "That's one way to put it,"
she grinned, folding her arms over her stomach. "We went exploring around an ancient Hold's ruins, and he filled me in on what he knew of its history before...well, before it became abandoned. The detailing that the Hold had... Shards, Almonteo, I'd never seen anything like it."

"It sounds like you had a good day of it," the Hallmaster nodded. "He must know a lot about the history of the Southern Continent if he knows Hold ruins. There were a lot in the beginning of our migration South. And of course after the original crossing."

"Of course." Traelyn was a little ashamed to admit that she didn't remember much from her lessons about the history of the original Crossing.
Now that she was older, chances were that she'd probably appreciate the facts and stories more...but back when she was a weyrbrat, running amuck underfoot with her friends, she just...hadn't cared.

He smiled. She didn't sound too confident about her command of history.
But how many riders really did, he wondered. "I take it history wasn't your favorite subject in Harper classes?"

Giving him a guilty little smile, she shook her head. "Shards no. I escaped whenever I could. With my friends. We'd all sneak away one by one on some sort of legitimate pretense or another... And let me tell you, our instructor caught on pretty sharding quickly!" Traelyn chuckled at the vague memories. "But the boys weren't as subtle as me. So really, it was their fault we got into so much trouble..."

"Sure, blame it all on the _boys_," Almonteo chuckled. "As the father of two daughters and two sons I can tell you that the girls can raise trouble just as much if not _better_ than the boys."

She blinked huge, innocent eyes at him. "Certainly not _me_." Then she wrinkled her nose. "Well, maybe. I mean, Lakub and Benram used to say to me all the time...." her voice suddenly trailed off, and she swallowed thickly, looking down. Oh for all the _sharding_ times to get so sharding emotional about it all! **Damn it, Trae.** Feeling her lifemate's sudden tangle of emotions, Nyith raised her head.

The Harper's trained ears could catch the waiver in her voice as it trailed off. He turned to look at her and asked gently, "Is this a painful subject, Traelyn?"

Hesitating, she studied her folded hands before glancing up at him. Nyith whuffed softly, encouraging. Another moment passed in silence, almost as if there was some kind of quiet internal struggle happening within. "Sometimes," she finally murmured.

"Do you want to tell me about it?" he asked, slipping into his father to daughter voice.

She began to shake her head--the automatic response she'd given to U'kaiah, N'vanik, J'darin... She was the Weyrwoman, for Faranth's sake! She shouldn't be acting like this towards Almonteo. She shouldn't....

}:Where is the harm in that, Trae?:{ the queen asked softly. }:He reminds me of your sire a little. Perhaps you could talk to him like you would your sire?:{ Traelyn gazed at Nyith, a little shocked by her quiet suggestion.

}:I do not forget those who are important in our lives. Talk to him.:{ Again, she hesitated. But this time.... "Have you...have you ever made a mistake that you wish you could go back and fix?"

"Oh yes," Almonteo nodded, a particular Turns End fling coming to mind. "Have you?"

Nodding slowly, she studied her clasped hands. "There's a lot of things."

"You are too young to have so much to regret, Traelyn," the Hallmaster said as he reached out to lay his hand over hers. "Which one is consuming your thoughts so?"

A wry, bitter half-smile curved her lips. **One that's the center of the sharding web, connecting to all the others...** "...It's a man."

**It usually is...** He nodded for her to go on.

Traelyn looked at him. "I mean, that's not really very surprising, is it?
The sharding Weyr is full of rumors flying around about _everything_... and we goldriders are the ones who are put in most of the sharding spotlight." **Especially the Weyrwoman...**

He again nodded his understanding. The harper had learned long ago sometimes it was better to just let a person talk and listen to what was being said, and unsaid, when they felt free to speak without fear of interruption.

Pressing her lips together, she crossed her arms over her chest, hating the way she sounded so scorching...._young_. She sat there in silence for a long moment, trying to sort through the conflicting emotions building up within her. At last, she whispered, "I'm only now starting to realize that I lost something when I was...younger..."

"Oh?" the Hallmaster asked quietly. "What did you lose?"

"Love."

"What happened, Traelyn?" he asked softly.

She thought of L'kub, of his smile, his eyes, of the way he spoke to her, the way he held her... They'd been so young, but their feelings for each other had been real. More real than anything she'd ever felt. And then she had betrayed his trust...betrayed _him_. She closed her eyes against the memory. And for what? Her jaw tightened as she slowly shook her head.

Almonteo sighed and put his arm around her. Perhaps it was not the most appropriate thing. If other harpers saw their Hallmaster with his arm around a woman not his wife, they might wonder, and whisper. But Almonteo was a father before he was a Hallmaster, and he knew when a daughter needed to be comforted, even when she was not his own.

At first she held herself stiffly as she tried to shove everything away, but then, as she closed her eyes, she began to ease into the small embrace, brushing her cheek across his arm, taking comfort in the touch.

"You know, just because you lost it once doesn't mean you cannot find it again."

She thought of B'ram, and the most recent night she'd lain in his arms. She remembered the way he had made love to her. And even though it was Atreyn's name he'd called out in the darkness instead of hers, he'd brought the memory of L'kub to life. **And I've been doing everything I can to hold on to what I've found...**

Last updated on the June 7th 2006

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