Escaping (2/2)

Writers: Devin, Bree
Date Posted: 17th January 2007
Series: Saving Each Other

Characters: N'vanik, Talryne
Description: N'vanik takes Talryne to the beach, and things get interesting in more than one way
Location: Dragonsfall Weyr, Elsewhere on Pern
Date: month 1, day 28 of Turn 4

N'vanik

Talryne

"Well, I came to the Weyr after that," she said, trying to change the subject. Not that anything that had happened _after_ she'd left the Hall had been particularly pleasant. "I sort of got myself into trouble."

"I got into trouble after I left home, too," he said. "But at least I was free."

She wanted to ask him what sort of trouble, but could see why he might not want to share. She wasn't in any hurry to describe her transgressions in detail, after all. "I don't even know where you're from."

"Jade Harbour," he said with only the slightest hesitation. "Then I was holdless for a while. I Impressed at Vista Point, moved to Dream's End and then I was sent to Dragonsfall." It seemed like a lot of information to give at once.

"Oh..." Talryne digested that for a moment. "I have some family at Jade Harbour still. Most of them are at the healer hall, though. And I've never really wanted to go back there."

"Me either." It came out more harshly than he meant it to.

Talryne studied his face and then rolled back over on her back and closed her eyes. "You don't have to talk about it."

"I know I don't," he mumbled. But his thoughts had already turned that way. The weight of his past held him down, no matter where he went, no matter what he did. He trusted that Talryne wouldn't use the information against him. She was safe. N'vanik covered his eyes with his arm and started talking. "Years ago, there was a young woman, and she was married off to an older man. Nothing unusual about that. Happens all the time. Well, after a while she got pregnant. The healers warned her that it would be hard. When the time came, though, she gave birth to a boy.
The healers warned her again, and told her another pregnancy would risk her life. A few years went by, and the man decided he wanted another child. So the woman got pregnant again. The birth was rough, and as soon as she had the baby, she died. The baby, another boy, lasted two days, and then he died too. The man blamed his son, figuring if he was only going to have one child, it should have been a better one. Nothing the boy did was good enough."

N'vanik took a deep breath. "When the boy got older and learned how babies were made, he blamed his father for killing his mother. The yelling and the beating didn't stop, so when the boy was 14, he got out of there, and he never went back."

Talryne's hand slid onto his arm, and she tugged it down so she could meet his eyes. "Then he was an idiot, and didn't deserve you."

Her response was better than sweet sympathy would have been. "You say such nice things," he said with a ghost of a smile. "But sometimes it's hard not to believe he was right."

"Well, he wasn't," she replied, without thought. "But I can't make you believe it. At least, that's what the mindhealers kept telling me..."
She smiled wanly. "Something about how I had to want to believe it or something."

"Believe what?"

Talryne shrugged a little uncomfortably. "Lots of different stuff. My mother was sick and I left her to come to the Weyr and she died. And after that I did a lot of stupid things. I thought... I thought I deserved it."

"I know the feeling," he said. "I keep ruining the good things in my life."

"Me, too." She shifted onto her back and closed her eyes. "I'm sure it's only a matter of time until I do something terrible to you. I'm sorry in advance."

While he hadn't done something terrible to her, he had done something terrible. "Me too," he echoed. Before he could stop himself, he leaned over and kissed her.

She'd grown used to the comfortable feeling of kissing him, but this wasn't quite the same. It could have been any number of things--the feeling of sun-warmed skin under her hands, or the gentle sound of the waves or even the confessions lingering between them. Something was different now.

N'vanik trailed kisses along her neck and dared to slide a hand across her hip. Was he imagining things, or was Talryne being more responsive?

Her hand slid into his hair, tightening when his lips found the sensitive spot where her neck met her shoulder. Even though she could feel her body slowly beginning to respond, her mind felt distressingly empty. The echoing silence in her mind gave her no indication as to what she should do next. Instead of racing thoughts or confusion... there was simply nothing.

Without even thinking about it, she reached out to Loseth, just wanting to hear _something_. **I don't know what to do.**

The drowsing bronze lifted his head. }:Do what makes you feel good,:{ was his sleepy reply.

For a few moments she waited to see if his words evoked anything, but her mind drifted in the same numb silence. So she tightened her fingers in his hair again and pulled his head up so she could meet his eyes.
"Can you make me feel good?"

N'vanik swallowed, suddenly nervous. "I can try." Oh, he wanted to, but what if it made things worse?

Talryne had challenged men's egos before to goad them into proving themselves, but this time her words were starkly honest. "You're good at making me feel less bad, but I'm not sure I can feel good anymore."

"Tal, I don't . . ." he laid his hand on her cheek. "I don't know what to do."

"We should go swimming," she replied quietly. "Because if neither of us can figure out what to do, that's not a very good sign."

An image flashed though his head of sliding on top of her, kissing her until they could hardly breathe, making the decision. But the risk . . .
"I just don't want to hurt you," he said. "So maybe you're right." It was not an easy thing to say. He wanted her so bad.

"Hurt me?" Her eyebrows drew together slightly as she stared up at him.
"I'm not worried about being hurt. I just don't think--" Her cheeks flushed and she closed her eyes as her voice dropped to a whisper.
"Everything's so disconnected... I don't know if I can be the same girl I was before. And I don't want you to be disappointed. I don't want to lose what we have now when I still need it."

N'vanik sighed. "We're thinking about this too much, and that isn't good." What he was thinking about now was the tenderness he'd shown Abrei. Then it had been a lie, but with Talryne it would be the truth.
What it might mean and how it might change things was strengthening his instinct to run. "So, let's go swimming, and then we can have a nap in the shade."

"All right." And the fact that she didn't know if she was relieved or disappointed was proof enough that he was right.

Last updated on the January 17th 2007

[Prev: Escaping (1/2)] Series: Saving Each Other [Next: What Part Of 'Guest' Does No One Understand?]

Welcome to Triad Weyrs!

Escaping (2/2)