Struggling With the Secret

Writers: AL, Jane
Date Posted: 17th September 2009

Characters: Meledei, K'hetah
Description: Meledei talks to K'hetah about her frustration in keeping secrets from those she loves.
Location: Dolphin Cove Weyr
Date: month 4, day 20 of Turn 5

"Good evening senior weyrling," K'hetah said as he stepped outside and found the young weyrwoman paused there in that shadows cast by the spill of light from the dining cavern behind them. "Waiting for somebody?"

"Good evening, Wingleader." Meledei offered. She glanced behind her. She had already eaten and F'gol had gone off to check on Tealth. No, there were other things on her mind. "K'hetah, actually, I was wondering if I could talk to you."

"Well, of course." K'hetah was a little surprised by the young woman's request. They talked, every now and then, but in the most general of ways. "Now?"

"Is this a bad time?" The subject wasn't pressing, Meledei just really wanted to talk about it and it made her antsy. It certainly wasn't life or death. She could be patient, but occasionally, patience didn't come around.

"Not if we won't run into your curfew. Do you still have one now you're out of the barracks?" His own weyrlinghood had been considerably different from what these weyrlings experienced since his was only trying to ready him for a life with a dragon, and nothing more.

"Oh yes, we still have a curfew, but there's a good couple of hours before that." Meledei assured him. She didn't want to get into trouble and wasn't about to run that risk. "My free time just started."

"Then of course you can talk to me. Should we go to my office? or just wander aimlessly around the Weyrbowl." The space was big enough that even in the socially busier time of the early evening there was little chance of any conversation being overheard.

"This is definitely not something that should be overheard so I think I'd rather talk behind a closed door." Meledei knew that most likely they wouldn't be over heard, but she didn't want to take that chance. "If that's okay."

"That's fine." Luckily the Wing offices weren't all that far from the dining cavern entrance and the pair walked across the Bowl toward the corridor that gave access to the office. As they walked K'hetah made the proper inquiries about the health and progress of Elleth so that by the time they entered the office and he flipped open the lid of the glowbasket beside the door the small talk was dispensed with. "Open up the others, if you like, Meledei," the bronzerider suggested as she shut the door. "And take one of those seats," he said, waving at the group of armchairs between the desks and the shelving at the back of the room that was cluttered with papers and hides.

Meledei uncovered one more glow, bringing the light to a level that made things visible, but was soft on the eyes. It was soothing, so Meledei left it as such before she took one of the proffered seats. "Sometimes, I like glowlight better than electrical." She mused.

"Lucky attitude at Dolphin Cove," he pointed out. "Nothing like being happy with your lot."

Meledei smiled at the comment and then cleared her throat. "I wanted to talk to you about something."

"So you said. What's bothering you, Meledei?"

"It's about Timing." Meledei shifted in her chair, as if she were uncertain she should be discussing it at all.

"Ahh. You're up to that in your weyrling training, are you?" He remembered his own weyrlinghood which had been somewhat lazier than hers, no doubt. "What about it?"

"Yes, I am." Meledei nodded slowly. "I wanted to know...have you ever done it?"

"Not deliberately," K'hetah said firmly, "but once, I may have made a mistake and ... well, I can't think of any other explanation. I got my bearings and came home smartly, I must say."

"What was it like?" Meledei didn't have any plans to do it, but she was curious.

"Nothing was different, really. Perhaps little longer /between/ and then - for me the only explanation for the differences was that we'd gone back in time. I was _worried_ but that's because I'd done something unexpected when going /between/ - which is all too often the last thing dragonriders do. Loeth didn't care. I suppose it's a
natural ability for them, like flaming." He shrugged. "At least I went back - I think - rather than forward like the Weyrharper."

"I'm struggling with the secret." Meledei didn't like keeping secrets, particularly from F'gol. She knew Ri'len was having the same problem. What could she do about it?

Yes, what indeed. The thought crossed her mind, but would it work? Could she? Should she? Meledei wriggled where she sat. "I don't think it's right to keep this from others."

"Neither do I," K'hetah agreed, "but you were entrusted the secret on the understanding that it was in confidence."

"It's stupid!" Meledei huffed impatiently. "I have to keep a secret from people I trust and who trust me. I wish I had never been told."

"Might as well wish you'd never Impressed a Elleth, then, because there are going to be any number of things over your lifetime that you're going to have to keep from your friends and lovers."

"Well, this is something that _shouldn't_ be kept." Meledei shook her head. "It's not right. They should know too."

"Why don't you take it up with the Weyrleader or Weyrwoman. I'm in a position to agree with you, Meledei," he pointed out reasonably, "but not in a position to make any changes."

"I doubt they'll listen to me." Meledei sighed and shook her head. "But I knew you would, even if it was just someone to complain to."

"I'm glad you feel that way," he told her. "But remember that somebody you might be the person who can make changes to this - and other things. Don't give up hope."

"Yeah." Meledei wondered how. She had gotten an idea, but would it work? She'd have to think on it.

Last updated on the September 20th 2009

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Struggling With the Secret