Looking for a Gift

Writers: Ames, Clancey
Date Posted: 26th November 2010

Characters: Dysali, Maemira
Description: Maemira tries to help Dysali find a gift for another
Location: Harper Hall
Date: month 11, day 27 of Turn 5
Notes: Mentioned: D'ren, Tavia

Dysali frowned over the pile of straps in her lap. Wags was curled up asleep and Lillyth was either asleep or doing a very good job pretending. She suspected her lovely green was worn out from her rider's continual sadness and loneliness.

She sighed. Even with D'cal's help, she had not really returned to "herself" since D'ren had broken up with her. It had been months and months, but it didn't change. A couple days ago, she'd seen him having dinner with another greenrider, Tavia, who flew in the Queen's wing. The jealousy had nearly swallowed her whole, until she'd remembered herself and that this was a Weyr, for Faranth's sake. The jealousy had vanished like charred Thread, but not the sadness.

She missed him, all the time.

He seemed to be doing fine without her, and that was almost enough to make her happy.

Almost.

His birthingday had come and gone. The first in 3 turns they had not spent together. She hadn't gotten him anything, knowing it wouldn't be welcome.

But... maybe she could... just to let him know she was still here.

Her frown deepened. What to get him though?

It didn't take long to arrive at a solution, though. D'ren didn't spend much time on his music any more, but she knew he still liked to play. Maybe she could wander over to Harper Hall and purchase a new song for him to play.

The frown disappeared and she stood, going off to clean herself up and wake Lillyth up for a ride.

~*~
As expected, Lillyth wasn't too far asleep. **Wake up, beloved. I need a ride, please. And you need some exercise, lazy thing!**

}:I am not ...lazy! But I would like to go out for a bit. I will carry you wherever you like, mine. As always.:{

To the Harper Hall, then. Her green deposited her near the entrance to what the Harper's considered their "Hall" at the Weyr. She hadn't been here in months. Months. She slipped inside, looking for someone she knew to direct her on where to get some music.

Maemira had been bustling about checking on the various areas of the Hall. All seemed to be in order. Classes were in session for some of the new apprentices, and she'd finally settled in some of the new students whom she had to keep a close eye on. Moving toward the main entryway, she wanted to check on the desk that they kept here in case someone had need of it.

That was when she spotted the auburn haired woman standing just inside the corridor. She hadn't met her, herself, having only been here for a few short months as it were.

"May I help you with something?" She asked as she approached the woman. "I don't believe we've met. I'm Maemira, the Headwoman here. I'd be happy to help in anyway I can."

Dysali blushed quite pinkly, feeling almost 'caught' in a place she shouldn't be. Although she was pleased to see someone coming to find her, and the Headwoman no less, she felt very unsure all of a sudden. What was she doing here? What if D'ren just threw the songs out or was cold to her or a dozen other horrible thoughts that crossed her mind on the question 'may I help you with something..'. ****Yes, you can help me get over my fascination with a certain bronzerider *** she thought.

The thought finally pulled a smile out of her and she tipped her head respectfully to Maemira. "Hello, Headwoman! I'm Dysali,rider of green Lillyth." And yes, she said it proudly. Her knots were plain to see, but she still liked saying it out loud. For all her youth, she'd Impressed Lillyth on her first try, over two turns ago. She felt turns older than 16, even if she didn't look it. "I hope you can help me. I was wanting to buy or trade for some music for a... friend." In her pouch, she had some of her jewelry, made of bits of pretty shells and things, and a few precious marks she had worked very hard to earn. She wasn't sure what music cost, to be honest. "He's a Harper, and I was just thinking a new song or two for him to play might be a good birthingday gift." She blushed again, unsurprisingly. She didn't realize she gave away a world of information with the simple word 'he'.

Maemira nodded as she listened to the young rider. Her face however took on a knowing look as she spoke.

"Ah, I special someone, I take it," she grinned with a bit of a wink. "Here, why don't we go into the main sitting room. We can talk a bit about your special...friend if you'd like and see if we have a song already crafted or if you'd rather have one specially made just for him."

Maemira took her arm and linked it through the greenriders. Without another thought, she led the woman into a room and indicated she could take a seat on one of the softer chairs available. Bustling about a moment or two, she gathered up a few glasses on a tray and brought them to Dysali. It had been a slow day and Maemira would like a little company and female chatter. There were _far_ too many men in the Harper Hall and not nearly enough women to gossip with.

"So, tell my Dysali, what is your special Harper friend like? Does he work here at the hall? If so, we might have to be a bit more secretive with your special gift." Maemira grinned and raised her eyebrows a bit as the thought of harboring a secret from one of her Harpers, yes, _her_ Harpers as she affectionately thought of them in her mind.

"It will cost more if you'd like to have a special song crafted just for him. But we always have a store of some extras songs around that are not solely unique, but are newer or created by some of our younger Harpers."

Dysali blushed furiously as her 'secret' was uncovered so rapidly. But she shouldn't be surprised. Its not as if her feelings were possible to hide... from anyone.

But she,too, was happy to spend time with someone as friendly and well, motherly, as Maemira. Dysali was badly in need of mothering, having been without one since she was seven turns, and then growing up so very fast once she came to the Weyr.

Arm tucked in with Maemira's, she let herself be led along, thinking about what to say. Maybe she should tell her the whole, sad story? Maybe the woman would have insight...

But no, she barely knew her. She so _wanted_ to reach out to someone, anyone, for love. To help open her heart back up, the way it has been...before.

Sitting down in the chair, Dysali finally said, quietly, "Well, he was an apprentice. Now he's a bronzerider at the Weyr. He spends less time playing now but he used to enjoy it. Before...." She paused, taking a drink of what Maemira offered then went on. "He was my first boyfriend. We were together for two turns... and then... we weren't... And well, he hasn't been talking much. I thought maybe if I gave him some music, I don't know really. He seems fine without me, but I'm not very fine." She blushed again.

"But for the choices, something already written will be fine." She paused, waiting pensively. What would the Headwoman think of a young greenrider just coming in and ...spilling her whole story?

Maemira nodded her head as Dysali spoke. Sometime during the younger woman's speech, Maemira had leaned forward to listen. When Dysali finished, she reached out and patted the rider's hand before speaking.

"We give our hearts to the men of this world, and they, being so caught up in themselves, so often do not appreciate the love and care we offer. Sometimes, my dear, we can help change their hearts, but alas, other times, we cannot. Life has a funny way of working out, though, one way or the other." Maemira gave her a gentle, caring smile. "You will be stronger for all this. Trust me, I know. Two turns, sixteen turns, it's all the same when they leave us." She made a small clucking sound in the back of her throat. "You know, when my husband left I thought my life would never have meaning again. I learned, instead, that there was _so_ very much more to life than I had ever realized!" She chuckled, recalling her little dalliance with a certain steward at one Hold she had worked. _That_ had been quite...invigorating.

Sitting up straighter she gave Dysali a firm nod. "Now, if you want to win his heart back, we've got to find just the perfect song to share with him, don't we?" The glint in her eye spoke of a woman on a mission. "Wait here." Rising, Maemira bustled quickly to a back wall and came back with five scrolls in her hand. "I think these might be the right caliber for what you have in mind. We have some others in stock, but some are a bit too...dreary, in my opinion." She grinned an almost conspiratorial grin at the rider. "But don't let the Harpers hear such comments for they might hole themselves up and not write pretty pieces for us in the future." Maemira laid the scrolls on the table as she settled back into her seat.

She smiled tentatively in response to the lady's joking and nodded. "I promise not to tell." The smile broadened a bit more, but then Dysali blushed so bright it was hard to see her eyes and took the hides from Maemira with a shaking hand. "Well... I don't think its possible for me to win his heart back, Headwoman. I saw him with another greenrider just the other day. Truthfully, I do not know what I'm trying to accomplish by giving him a song or two. I still love him so very much... " Saying it out loud made her cringe a little. She was a fool, wasn't she? The scars gained from fighting Thread did stand out a little more against her tan and blushing cheeks. One was small, on her cheek, and the other was more visible, on her arm.

"I know that I'm a dragonrider and we are not supposed to settle on just one partner. Especially not at 16 turns!" Hard to believe that is all she was, even to her. "And we both were ...with ... other people during our time together. But only for flights. ONLY for flights. Until the end... then we weren't together at all." She was really so sad, it was pathetic. She wanted to be tough and strong and have a whole heart.... but she just didn't have it in her.

To try to hide some of her emotions, she busied herself looking down at the hides.

"Ah, lass," Maemira reached forward and placed her hand over Dysali's to draw her attention. "Our hearts lead us in places we cannot always imagine. If you love him, you love him. There's no harm in loving another, even when things do not work out." Maemira smiled kindly at the young girl. "Don't let anyone tell you that love doesn't hurt. It does. Even when things seem good, love still hurts. They say that those who've loved once have the strongest hearts and will love again. So, even if your friend cannot return the gift of love you feel, you're heart will learn to love again."

Sitting back some, she looked at Dysali. "Why do you want to give him this gift then. If you're not hoping to win back his love? Until you acknowledge what it is you hope to accomplish, you likely won't be able to reach your goal, whatever that may be."

Dysali considered this with a little internal cringing. Even this lady, who barely knew her, thought she was being ridiculous. She would never be good enough for D'ren, would she? Foolish, foolish girl. Idiotic girl. What was she trying to accomplish? She knew D'ren would never want her again. He'd made that very clear. So why was she here? Foolish, foolish girl. Idiotic girl.

Tears stinging her eyes, she nodded slowly. "You're right, Headwoman. I guess it was stupid of me to come. I'm sorry for wasting your time." She pushed back the hides to the woman and stood up. She would just go take care of Lillyth. That is all she was good for, it seemed. Taking care of her dragon, and flaming Thread from the skies.

In her head, Lillyth began to croon. }:I love you. We are good together. Come, we will fly. :{ Lillyth offered with the ease of dragons. She didn't understand why her rider was so upset. but she knew that her rider was _not_ upset when she was on Lillyth's back, so on her back she would put her, and they would fly.

Maemira could tell the change in the girl the instant it happened, only seconds before the hides were pushed back towards her and Dysali rose to leave.

"Ah, lass. You've not been a bother at all. I'm sorry if I've offended you in someway," Maemira said, feeling terribly as she could tell the young girl was struggling with this love of hers. "Sometimes I need to learn to keep my mouth shut, but I'm a chatty sort and I often overstep my bounds." Maemira reached for the hides, smoothing them and stacking them, preparing to put them away as it seemed she'd lost the Hall a customer. What should she say now? "I hope you won't hold the Hall responsible for my comments, Dysali. Master Almonteo would be rather unhappy to know that I'd turned away a customer because I couldn't stop meddling in your affairs." With the hides neatly stacked, Maemira, the light slightly diminished in her eyes, rose with the hides in her arms, preparing to carry them back to where they belonged.

Last updated on the January 21st 2011

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Looking for a Gift