Irreconcilable Differences

Writers: Suzee, Eimi
Date Posted: 19th February 2011

Characters: Benani, Shadux
Description: Shadux doesn't spare the Lady Holder from his true feelings
Location: Amber Hills Hold
Date: month 13, day 16 of Turn 5
Notes: Mentioned: Zathris, Wirnan

Benani

Benani was in her office working on the final plans for her big Turn
Over event and had asked Shadux to come assist her with a few of the
last minute preparations.

Shadux strode unceremoniously into the Lady Holder's office. It was
silly to stand on ceremony when they had known each other practically
their whole lives. "You want some help with something?"

"Yes please Shadux," she said. Benani was always polite it cost her
nothing and bred good will with those who served the hold. "This Turn
Over will be a little bigger than we've had in the past," she began.
Then she turned the hide she'd been working on around so he could take
a look at it. "Here is my guest list beyond the hold."

Shadux glanced at it. Well, wasn't that just what Amber Hills needed?
More strangers invading it. "That's a long list," he said, keeping his
tone neutral.

"Yes," she said. "We haven't had a Turn Over like this since I was a
girl." She remembered one in particular when she was small and she
felt on top of the world when Benaroy had carried her around on his
shoulders for hours.

"I'm going to need lettered invitations sent to the Weyrleaders and
the outlying holds."

"I can get the harpers to work on that." The Scribners always knew
they'd be busy this season. "Unless you want it done by the Hall of
course. That can also be arranged."

"The Scribners are fine," she said. "They do good work. But make sure
we get responses back. We'll need to know how many we have to house
and if we'll need to cull some of the herds for visiting dragons." She
shook her head. "I know you know all this, I'm just going over it in
my head."

**Your husband could always push the Amber Hills people out into the
fields in tents...** He though sourly, though he wouldn't let his face
show it. "You know the herders will want to hide their herds in the
canyons once they hear a lot of dragons are coming."

"It is no more than their due and you know that. We send out tythe out
on schedule. The herders just don't see dragons feeding and are afraid
of what it will do to their stock." Not that she particularly wanted
to see it herself. She leaned on her elbows. "Just have a pen set up.
The riders normally feed their dragons before they come for a visit
anyway." She picked up her pen again.

"I know as much, but the herders are convinced they'll come to steal
their herbeast and their daughters. Does Zathris know?" Or did he even
know that much about the people he was Lording over?

"Shadux? What is going on?" she asked puzzled. "Do you somehow think
I can throw a huge party with dragon riders present and Zathris would
_not_ know?"

Shadux rolled his eyes. Leave it to Benani to purposefully
misunderstand him. "I meant, does Zathris know that the herders don't
trust the dragonriders and that many of them will try to hide their
herds when they come." That he _did_ trust her to know but her husband
not to. He wasn't Amber Hills born and bred.

She shook her head. "I will thank you to remember, Zathris is a Lord
Holder's son Shadux. Of course he knows, and he cares about the people
of Amber Hills just as much as he did about those at Jade Harbor.
When he took Hold here he vowed to care for _this_ hold's residents.
He meant every word." She stopped. Of course she'd naturally jumped to
her husband's defense. "Do you feel that we should do something
differently?" She knew he had a great deal of experience and she
should consider his advice.

How could she talk to him like he was one of her errant servants! Not
even her father ever took that tone with him and he had earned that
right far more than she had! "Why would you ask me, m'Ladyship? I'm
just a lowly Stewards Assistant," he said, all but spitting out the last
word. "How could my experience ever compare to the Lord's infinite
wisdom on Amber Hill matters?"

She looked at him for a moment stunned, bereft of words. She wouldn't
have been more surprised if he had slapped her. She selected her next
words very carefully. "Your service to this hold has been exemplary. I
have never heard a single word against your abilities" She stood
behind her desk. "I sought your advice because of that fact. However,
if you have a problem with the way _Lord_ Zathris is running his Hold,
I would suggest you take it up with him. I will be happy to provide you
with a letter of reference once you have done so. That is if you care
to use the same tone with him." She leaned on her fingertips. "I am
the Lady Holder here now Shadux and not my fathers umpteenth child any
longer."

Well, she sure had grown uppity now that she had a title, hadn't she.
Who did she think she was talking to! Had she forgotten that he had
been raised right along side her? That his father and grandfather had
served her father? Served her _family_ for generations? How could she
talk to him like he was just one of her servants! One of her
subordinates! He leaned right back over her desk and looked her square
in the eye. "I preferred you much better, Benani, when you _were_ your
father's umpteenth child, and if he could see the way you and that
husband of yours have ruined the Hold he loved and held together for so
many Turns, he would be ashamed. I don't need a reference from you.
The fact that I was loved by your father is all the reference I'll ever
need in this world."

The fire she had inherited from her father Lord Benaroy sprang to life
inside her in a way she had never known before. "Ruined?" she asked.
"This hold is more profitable than it was during the turns my father
held here. It is growing and prospering." She didn't back down even
though he was larger and more powerfully built. Blue eyes bored into
Hazel and didn't flinch. "There is no doubt you are a part of that
success but perhaps your time here is ended and you should move on."
His entitlement issues had to be rejected out of hand. "My father made
a lot of people believe he loved them." She herself was devoted to him
even after she realized she wasn't his favorite. "You were neither the
first nor the last."

"I hope you land in a good place." she said without feeling. Her eyes
were blue ice as she nodded toward the door. "You're free to go. I'll
give these tasks to someone else."

And now she was dismissing him, just like that. Like he hadn't been
there for Turns. "You got a title and you forgot who you are. Whose
_daughter_ you are. It's sad to see, Benani. Real sad. Don't worry, I
have a good place, and I'll be going to it as soon as the Turn is over.
Consider this my notice. Good day, _Lady_ Benani." He turned on his
heel and walked out, now more confident than ever that the Hold that had
been his home was home no longer.

Transitions were hard, Benaroy had taught them that. So many things
the Hold had suffered since the plague before her time and the
earthquake after that. Each time he'd pulled things together and
welded his people into a unified workforce for the good of the hold
but sometimes the needlethorns had to be plucked out.

Benani rang for a drudge who appeared almost immediately. "Please ask
Wirnan to join me." She sat to contemplate how much of her
conversation with Shadux should be relayed to Zathris. She sank back
into her chair staring at the door and wishing it had ended
differently. She'd said things she regretted and now a lifelong friend
would be leaving the hold. Somehow, she knew it was unavoidable.

Last updated on the April 27th 2011

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Irreconcilable Differences