I didn't know you then

Writers: Eimi, Suzee
Date Posted: 26th June 2011
Series: It takes Time to Love

Characters: U'kaiah, Tavia
Description: Tavia has something to tell U'kaiah...
Location: Dolphin Cove Weyr
Date: month 2, day 18 of Turn 6
Notes: Follows: I wish I'd never met you

Tavia

She threaded her fingers into U'kaiah's as they walked away from
L'rak. She held his arm with her other hand and told herself just to
breathe in and out slowly to calm down. U'kaiah didn't deserve to have
his evening ruined just because her former weyrmate had decided to be
a tunnelsnake turd. She didn't know why she'd even told him her
pregnancy hadn't been his. She was just thankful U'kaiah had returned
when he had.

U'kaiah glanced over his shoulder to be sure the man who seemed to have
upset Tavia so was well and truly gone. Feeling her tension in the way
she clung to him, he guided her towards a less crowded area. "Are you
all right? Do you need a drink? Or some air?"

"I'll be fine," she said softly. "He's just... sorry." They hadn't
really had time to go through histories and she was sorry to inflict
this one on him now. "We were werymated at one time. It didn't end
well... for either of us."

He untangled his arm from hers and curled it around her waist, pulling
her closer as they walked. "Do you want to go?"

She'd never welcomed a suggestion more than this one but she didn't
want to curtail his fun if he wanted to stay a bit longer. "Are you
sure you don't mind?"

"It's just a Hatching," he assured her. While a Hatching had been a
rare celebration during the Interval, during the Pass they were becoming
a common event. "Let's go."

She squeezed his hand in gratitude. "That sounds good." They moved
through the corridors toward her weyr. When they entered she turned a
few glows to give them some light and began to pull the ribbons from
her hair. The pregnancy had seemed to make her hair grow suddenly
longer and now, curls tumbled down past her shoulders.

U'kaiah sat on the sofa and watched her silently as she moved around.
He was not sure what had transpired between her and the stranger, but he
was not sure she would consider it his business anyway. If she wanted
to talk about it, she would and so he just waited for her to make the
first move.

Her relationship with U'kaiah had changed, or rather it had actually
become a relationship. She contemplated for a few moments. Then she
turned and leaned against the table while she looked at him and
decided. "I need to tell you something you don't know about me."

"All right," he said with a nod for her to continue. She had his full
attention as he leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees.

"That was L'rak I was talking to earlier. We were weyrmated for awhile
and promised each other exclusivity outside of flights." She kicked
her shoes off and came to sit at the other end of the sofa. She sat
with her hand along the back of it and her feet tucked up under her.

"I was starry eyed and imagined myself in love." She shook her head.
"Of course it didn't turn out that way. I was heartbroken when I found
out." Even remembering it all now brought back some residual emotions.
She needed to focus and tell him what he had the right to hear.

"He broke his promise?" U'kaiah asked, helping her to go on. He
wouldn't be surprise. It would be a hard promise for himself to keep.
That was why he never made it, and never intended to do so.

She shrugged. "Yes, but that is part of the reason I don't make those
kinds of promises any more." Her heart had been badly broken so she
wasn't planning on putting it in that kind of jeopardy any time soon.
"Anyway, I kicked him out and refused to see him. I threw myself into
water ball... and well, we had that game and you..."

Tavia unwound her legs then screwed up her courage. "I got pregnant."
She couldn't look at him.

"You mean, that day? With me?" Her body language alone told him that
was indeed the case. But what exactly was she trying to tell him? "Is
there... Somewhere do we have..."

She gave a tiny shake of her head and her eyes finally lifted to his.
They were full of pain and shame. "I didn't know you then." She
couldn't speak at full volume. "I was in no state to be a mother, so
Sawauth... I..."

"Hey," he said, laying his hand over hers to try to reassure her. "Of
course you did. We were complete strangers then. Of course you did
what was best in the moment."

She turned her hand over so her palm faced his and her fingers curled
around his hand. She was very relieved that he understood that part,
but there was more that she wasn't quite so proud of. "Somehow L'rak
found out that I was pregnant and assumed it was his. When he
confronted me I couldn't believe how hurt he was. So... I let him keep
believing it... until recently."

His eyebrows raised as his lips formed an 'oh'. Nodding, some things
were making a bit of sense. "That complicates things a bit, I'm sure."

She almost snorted, "Yes, just a little." She took a deep breath and
said the words to U'kaiah that she had refused to say to L'rak. "I'm
sorry," she said and truly meant it.

"Tavia, truly, there's nothing you have to apologize to me for." After
all, considering the circumstances, it was probably the right decision.
"We have no control over the past anymore. I'm not worried about what's
done and over. The only thing we can have an effect on is right now -
this moment. Why waste it dwelling on what's past?"

The feeling of relief that washed over her made her realize how tense
she'd been waiting for his reaction. She squeezed his fingers and
finally relaxed against the back of the couch next to him. "Thank you
for understanding, you don't know how much that means to me."

He reached out to wrap his arm around her, pulling her closer into his
side and kissing her forehead softly. U'kaiah really hadn't liked
seeing her so upset and hoped she was feeling better now. "Is there
anything else you want to tell me?"

She leaned into his embrace and put her other arm against his chest.
"That was pretty much it." Her head dropped against his shoulder as
all the tension drained away. "Oh! I made some cookies. Would you like
one?"

"See, I _knew_ there was more you needed to tell me." He covered her
hand with his and rested his chin against her head. Shards, she smelled
good. Felt good, too. "I would love a cookie. But not yet. Let's
just sit here a minute."

She took a deep breath and just relaxed against his side drinking in
the calming effect of just being held. Some men just didn't get how
very much that helped. "Ooooh," she said and pulled his hand to her
lower abdomen. She could feel it quite well but didn't know if he
would from the outside. She pressed his fingers right where the kick
had occurred.

"What?" he asked, a little confused for a moment. The look turned to
one of surprise as he felt something move right under his fingers. "Is
that..."

"Yes, thats your baby." She giggled, "I think she's playing water ball."

"Well, he's going to be sharding good at it with kicks like that!"
U'kaiah grinned down at her, absolutely amazed at the feeling. "I can't
believe I can feel it. It's still so tiny."

She chuckled. "yeah, they all start that way. At first it was only
flutters but they're a lot stronger now. I was hoping you could feel
it."

"Kaiafel's going to love this." He still didn't know that he was going
to soon have a little brother or sister. "I think it's time to tell
him. Don't you?"

She agreed without a doubt. Her baby would already have a big brother.
It made her happy to know she, or he would be surrounded by so many
people who loved her. For some reason she was feeling pretty positive
about the girl thing. "Oh yes, I think it's a great idea." She lifted
her hand to the side of his face and moved her own closer for a kiss.

A feeling of contentment washed over him as he received her kiss, and
returned it with several soft kisses of his own. It suddenly dawned on
him just how lucky he was, with a strong, healthy son and another child
on the way. And Ravyan, too, was included in his thoughts as he often
was lately. He was growing fonder of the boy each time they met.
Moreover, he cared for two wonderful women who, by some chance of luck
or fate, seemed to care for him, too. U'kaiah wondered if this warm,
peaceful feeling was what Holders referred to as 'family'. If it was,
he was starting to understand why they deemed it so sharding important.

Last updated on the August 3rd 2011

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