Don't Want to Get Too Worked Up

Writers: AL, Ames
Date Posted: 9th August 2013

Characters: Meledei, T'nom
Description: Meledei and T'nom have a disagreement
Location: Dolphin Cove Weyr
Date: month 2, day 20 of Turn 7

T'nom

"What would you have done if you hadn't Impressed?" Meledei drew her
legs over and lay them across T'nom's lap as she lounged upon her
couch. Her arms came up to cushion her head and she gazed up a the
ceiling. "I know you mentioned leaving. Would you have really left?"

He placed a hand on her leg, trailing his fingers up and down. "I
don't know really," T'nom replied, thinking over her words. "I really
didn't want to stay if I didn't Impress. It was so hard to be passed
over so many times, but yet, if I'd left, I would never have met
Taldeth. We'd never have gotten this far together. And to be honest, I
had nowhere to go. I mean I have no one outside of the Weyr anymore. I
guess I could have traveled for my craft or tried to go back to the
Crafthall."

"What about you? I know you wouldn't have left, but what would you
have done if Turns had passed and_you_ never Impressed?" He knew it
was probably silly to ask. She'd been a rider now so much longer than
he.

"Me? I would have kept on standing and continued with my craft. If I
never Impressed, I would have become a beasthealer." It had been a
simple plan. Meledei wanted to fly, of course, but she had also loved
her craft and would have been happy. "I'm glad you Impressed. I have
a feeling I would have been trying to convince you to stay if you
hadn't."

"You might have had to. I was feeling pretty down on myself at that
time. It just seemed like it wasn't meant to be," T'nom replied, his
hand now resting gently on her leg. "Life has a funny way of working
out, doesn't it?" He gave her a smile that said his words meant more
than just Impressing Taldeth.

"Yes, yes it does." Meledei grinned and sat up. "Come on, let's_do_
something. Let's go swimming...oh, and there's a Gather up north this
coming rest day. Why don't we go?"

"I'd love to go to a Gather with you. Let me go grab my swim trunks
and I can meet you down by the beach." It was a beautiful day and
T'nom was_always_ up for a nice swim, especially when it meant he'd

get to swim with Meledei.

"Good. On both accounts. I asked Cosani too so I'm hoping she'll go.
I don't get to see enough of her." Both of them were busy, but
Meledei did her best to make time for her friends. Of course, things
with T'nom were different and they were spending more time together,
but she didn't want to ignore other people she cared about. "Anyway,
see you in a few minutes." Meledei lifted her feet off of T'nom so he
could run back to his weyr. Of course, she'd need to get her own
swimming clothes, but she was at least already at her weyr.

He gave her a grin and took off. He let Taldeth know their plans and
the bronze decided to join them in the water. T'nom arrived at the
beach just a short while later, swimming trunks on and towel draped
over his shoulder. He could see the bronze hide of Taldeth already
splashing in the water and he chuckled. He looked around to see if
Meledei was there yet.

"Hey slow poke." Came the call from the water and a hand lifted to
wave. "Catch me if you can." She dared him before diving down
beneath the surface.

He dropped his towel on the sand and started running. It didn't take
him long before he crashed into the surf. In a few moments, T'nom was
swimming out to where she was. He started treading water to give
himself a moment to catch his breath.

Meledei popped up behind him and tapped him on the shoulder, then
laughed. "Come on." She urged, then made a motion beneath the water.
"Our place."

It had been sometime since they had visited the little secluded
underwater cavern. Taking in a deep breath, T'nom dove down in the
water. He swam towards the opening, following the path he knew well.
Just when he thought his lungs might burst, he pushed under the cavern
entrance and emerged in the pool of water.

Meledei was already sitting on the 'floor' when he popped up. "Hey
slowpoke." She greeted,then patted the space beside her. "What took
you so long?"

He chuckled and shook his head, sending droplets of water flying. He
was already climbing out of the pool to join her. "You've always been
a better swimmer me than, Dei. I'm lucky I can keep up most of the
time." He flopped down beside her.

"You have to remember, I've lived around water most of my life."
Meledei leaned back and rest her head upon her hands as she gazed at
the glow above her. "I wonder if we could somehow wrap food to keep
it from getting wet and have a picnic here."

He thought about that. "I don't see how unless it was something that
wouldn't spoil if it got wet." There were foods that would work for
that, but it might not be the most appetizing picnic. "Too bad we
don't have some sort of waterproof container to carry things like that
in."

"Who would we go to for that?" Meledei's expression turned
thoughtful. "Maybe tanners? I bet they have something that's water
proof. Maybe I should look into it."

"I wonder if the dolphineers have something. I mean they_are_ in the

water all the time. I wonder if a bag of some sort could be fashioned
out of the stuff they wear for protection?" T'nom added his own
thoughts. He wasn't sure that the material would be completely
waterproof, even the suits they wore to swim in kept all the water
away.

"There's a thought. Maybe I'll head to the Dolphin Hall later this
sevenday and see if they have anything." Meledei grinned into the dim
light that surrounded them, the shadows friendly and inviting. "Then
we can have a picnic down here! That could be fun."

"That would be fun," he relied, flopping down to lay on the ground. He
patted the ground beside him, inviting Meledei to join him.

She turned over and propped up on her elbow. "Then I'll definitely
check it out." Her hand slid out and stopped to allow her fingers to
play over T'nom's.

He turned his fingers to capture hers, threading them together with a
smile on his face. He was glad she'd turned towards him. They were
close. T'nom scooted his body just a_bit_ closer, and then leaned in

to kiss her.

Meledei grinned and turned on her side so she could have better
access. Her lips sought his and the hand that wasn't laced with his
twined through his hair.

When she responded to his kiss, he deepened it. Darting his tongue
into her mouth. His free hand sliding up the side of her body to rest
against her hip.

Meledei smiled against his mouth, eager to continue, but at the same
time...well. "Easy there. Don't want to get too worked up, right?"

His face fell at her words, "Why not Meledei? I mean, we've been
working through this relationship stuff for some time now. I mean, its
not like either of us are virgins, back in the Hold. We don't _have_
to wait for some wedding day to share ourselves with each other. So
_when_ then do we go there?" He'd been following her rules in this
relationship since it started, and he wasn't sure exactly what those
_rules_ were, but considering that before he'd won her flight he'd
been free to enjoy the needs of body whenever he pleased, it was
_hard_ for him to resist the women when he wasn't even enjoying time
_with_ Meledei.

"I'm sorry." Meledei sighed and wriggled out from beneath him. She
sat up and curled her legs under her and then reached out for his
hands. "I'm not trying to frustrate you, it's just...well, I want it
to be special and...when I give myself to you physically, it's more
than just a fun time. I'm giving a piece of myself to you." F'gol
obviously hadn't understood that, which had been why he couldn't
understand why she had been so upset. "I gave it to F'gol and he
betrayed me. I'm not saying that you are going to do the same thing,
it's just..." She paused and gaze at him in the dimness of the glow.
"Did you realise that I've not been with anyone except F'gol outside
of flights?"

He wanted to heave a frustrated sigh at her refusal. He _was_
disappointed. Her kiss had led him to want more, yet she'd pulled away
from him again.

Sitting up, he allowed her to talk to him, to share her thoughts. It
didn't ease the frustrations he felt, but he was trying to understand
her and what she wanted.

"I can't say I did realize that Meledei, but isn't what we have
special now? When does it _get_ special if it's not special now?" He
wasn't sure what her thoughts were on the matter. "If we're not
actually _sharing_ that part of ourselves than _are_ we actually in a
true relationship yet? I'm supposed to be exclusive with you, but
right now I'm not even _with_ you in that way, does that make sense?
So, if we're exclusive, then why can't we share ourselves? If we're
not giving ourselves to each other, than are we really exclusive?" He
knew it was a slew of questions, running around in a circle, but it
was all so hard for him to grasp. He wasn't sure when, but somewhere
along the line he'd shed much of his holder traditions. The idea of
long drawn out courting wasn't something he considered now, the way he
might have in the past. Being a rider had changed him.

"It _is_ special, which is why I want to keep it that way." Meledei
could tell he didn't understand. What had changed? "Would you be
asking this of me if we were not dragonriders and in a hold? What
would you think of me if I were a holder girl and said yes to
something like this without hesitation?" Meledei had no problem with
what people wanted to do, it was their lives, but she also didn't want
to be judged for the choices she made for herself - and she wanted
someone who was going to understand. "I'm just asking for some time.
We've only been together for a month."

He listened to her. He _did_ understand what she was saying, but it
frustrated him for other reasons. There were women all over the Weyr
willing to allow him into their bedfurs, and yet he'd begged off of
all of them.

"Alright, so if this was the hold, I would have courted you. Though in
a month's time I might have already been thinking things were going in
a certain direction. I'd already be thinking about the future and
whether or not I'd want to ask your father for your hand in marriage."
He knew that was a bit of stretch, but if he'd spent _this_ much time
with a girl in courting, then he'd probably _have_ made plans to speak
to her father. Life didn't slow down outside the Weyr anymore than it
did inside.

"So _what_ are you saying then? I mean, you realize that outside the
Weyr, I might have been courting you, but that wouldn't have meant _I_
had to be celibate. Courting _isn't_ the same thing as marriage in
that regard. Had I married someone I would have stayed true to them
with no question, but until that bargain was struck there really
wouldn't have been any justification for my," he paused a bit, cleared
his throat and added, "not seeing to my needs."

"Oh I see. So you make a promise that you're going to be with someone
and just because you haven't taken vows yet, then it's okay to play
around with anyone you want until then?" Meledei could feel the anger
growing and she did her best to squelch it down, though not well
enough to take the annoyance out of her voice. "And what about the
girl? Would she have been expected to wait for her needs to be seen to
until marriage or could she have them seen to _before_ hand?"

He gave her a rather incredulous look. "You know that's not how it
works. Women can't do that." He was frustrated at her, at his own
desires, and at everything. He pushed himself up from the ground. "I
don't _live_ in that world anymore Meledei, so I can't tell you what I
might or might not have done then, but you're not giving me anything
here. I don't even know if this is _going_ anywhere, between us. It's
almost like we're just friends again, half the time, except I get to
kiss you now and then. So _when_ does it go somewhere, huh?"

"Why? Why can't women do it? If men can, it stands to reason women
can too!" Meledei stood as well, her hands clenched into fists. "And
to say otherwise is so sexist it's sickening. So it's okay for a man
to have fun, but what about the women he's having fun with? It's not
okay for them to have fun? Then why is the man having sex with them?
Or are they not people because they're 'loose' women?"

He looked at her in stunned silence for a moment. "I didn't make the
rules. Things have been this way on Pern as long as time itself." He
hadn't necessarily meant to start an argument, but he was frustrated
by so many things in his own life right now. "And I'm _sure_ the woman
is having fun. I never said _you_ couldn't be with other people."
T'nom was feeling rather confused by the whole argument himself. He
felt like he was running in circles in the sand and wasn't getting
anywhere except more and more lost.

He heaved a frustrated sigh and blurted out, "I haven't _been_ with
anyone since Elleth's flight. It's _hard_ on a man's body to go that
long. It's _different_ for women."

"You didn't make the rules but that doesn't mean you have to follow
rules that are obviously stupid and completely not right. You want me
to be with other people? You really think it's all that different
from a woman? That I don't feel desire? That I don't want your hands
touching me? You really think that? Then you really don't know
anything. You want me to be with other people? You want me to come
back with the smell of some man on me? With the knowledge that he's
been inside me, kissed me, touch me and you get the leftovers? You
really want that?" Meledei took a step back and shook her head. "No.
I'm not like that. I've seen what being open and what sharing
multiple beds does and in most cases it's not pretty. You want that
T'nom? Fine, that's your choice and you can do whatever you want - but
then that means you're not going to be with me."

She didn't give him a chance to respond. Anger was building far too
hot inside her. Meledei quickly submerged back into the water before
the bronzerider could get another word in. If he thought she'd been
fast before, she had certainly fooled him. By the time he'd
resurface, shed be at the shore at the very least. When she did reach
the shore, she set off at a run. She didn't want to look at him. She
didn't want to speak to him. And she didn't want him to see the salty
water that stung her eyes.

Last updated on the August 17th 2013

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Don't Want to Get Too Worked Up